The Beach :

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Free Parking: Beach Sticker Season Is Over

It's that time of the year when the playing field is leveled. No more parking stickers needed at the beach. The great unwashed masses are finally free to wiggle their toes in that same rarefied sand that the billionaires do every weekend during the summer. And you don't have to worry about finding a $125 ticket on your windshield when you get back to your car. Ah, the joys of September.

See more in Intel: Rules and Regulations

WeatherDesk: Extended Season Renters Edition

We know, we know. Most of you packed up last weekend and have already forgotten about the Hamptons. But for the select few, those sage individuals who know what September has in store for the Hamptons, we're providing this WeatherDesk Update. Frankly, the news could be a little better. Sunday is not looking so great, but don't fear. If you went extended season that suggests you've got a few extra bucks in the bank, which also means you can afford a day off. Friday is looking great. Take it while you can.
· 10-Day Southampton Forecast [Weather.com]

See more in Intel: WeatherDesk

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Tumble Weed Tuesday: Hope You're Not Hungry

For locals in the Hamptons, every summer ends with Mimosa Monday down on Sagg Main Beach where everyone hangs out, drinks—you guessed it—mimosas, and rehashes the trials, tribulations and even a few of the pleasures that each summer brings. This is followed by Tumble Weed Tuesday when the jokes begin about everything closing down for the winter. But we didn't expect it to start this early.

Out looking for a bite for lunch, a colleague reports that Bay Burger, Townline BBQ and Corner Bar are all closed for the day. They'll be open tomorrow...maybe. Or certainly the day after that. Probably. Either way, we hope they're having a nice day at the beach because they earned it.

See more in About Town: Closed for the Season

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Last Weekend Wrap: Diddy, Rock Stars & Horses

Shed a tear, shake the last of the sand out of your beach bag before stowing it for the winter and reflect back on what was an incredible summer. Labor Day weekend did not disappoint: the weather was perfect, the parties were hopping and if you spent the weekend asleep on the beach, here's what you missed...

The rock gods dusted off the cobwebs and stepped up to the stage at Jon Bon Jovi's end of the summer party. No less than Bon Jovi, Paul McCartney, Billy Joel, Jimmy Buffett and Pink Floyd's Roger Waters all took the stage to jam together for an hour. Bruce springsteen was there, though he missed the jam session but that didn't stop New Jersey Governor Jon Corzine from leading the crowd out on the dance floor. As one guest said: "It was the first Hamptons party in years that was actually fun." (Clearly, this guest missed the Burger Off.)

The strictest dress code of the summer was enforced at Diddy's White Party. One partygoer was forced to remove his off-white pants—in the middle of the street—and put on a more appropriate pair of completely white pants that were bouncer approved. Katie Lee Joel—Billy's wife—was also turned away at the door for wearing an off-white dress as well. Among those who showed up and passed dress-code muster were: Mariah Carey, Busta Rhymes, Donna Karan, Ashley Olsen, Star Jones and Tommy Lee.

After the jump, the rest of the weekend revealed...

See more in About Town: The Word

Friday, August 31, 2007

Weekend Agenda: Final Weekend

Like watching a crash in slow motion, you knew how this was going to end. But it's here. The last weekend of the summer. Let's make it a good one.

Bling But No Bang: Celebrate the fact that, as of Tuesday, you can no longer wear white. Everyone thought Diddy sold out earlier in the summer when he threw a mid-summer white party at the Hampton Bays club, the Whitehouse. But Diddy didn't disappoint because he's throwing the usual shindig this Sunday at his East Hampton home. The guest list will be decidedly more discerning than the last affair and $40 won't get you in the door. And sadly, East Hampton Town nixed his fireworks permit, so it'll have to be a demure, subtle affair.

Fake Breasts, Fake Blonds: Stereo by the Shore may actually have the lowest collective IQ of any spot in the Hamptons tonight. Quoth the press release: "What causes an internationally celebrated rock-icon to sublimate his ego and surrender to the irresistible allure of synthesized beats, dirty electro basslines, and searing, loopy melodies?" Stereo by the Shore, natch. Tommy Lee is DJing tonight—yeah, we know, it's kind of like watching Mike Tyson figure skate.

A few other options to keep in mind, after the jump...

See more in Intel: At Your Service

Traffic Report: Hurry Up and Wait

You pretty much knew this was coming. Perfect weather has angered the traffic gods and the back up at the end of the Sunrise Highway stretches for miles right now. But this is the only appropriate way to start the last weekend of the summer as it makes you just a little less nostalgic for the Hamptons. Welcome to the weekend.
· Hamptons Merge Cam [Hamptons.com]

See more in Intel: Traffic

LinkHampton

· Hope you had a good time: Summer rentals for $1 million and $900K [TheRealDeal]
· An exciting weekend for Kelly Ripa?: watching her husband play Bocce [Newsday]
· Heather Mills causing mayhem with her parking practices in East Hampton [seriouslyomg]
· Billion dollar price tag cancels offshore wind farm plans [Danshamptons]
· Ricky "Trust me, I've been coming out here since '06" Van Veen talks cars [Danshamptons]
· Surfing is a crime: 12 more tickets issued to Montauk surfers [Surfline]
· The five stages of grief: last days of summer sparks some serious depression [NY Sun]

See more in Intel: Link Hampton

Thursday, August 30, 2007

The End: Summer's Over and More Bad News

The weather is perfect. At least we have that. But it looks like everything else is going to hell in a hand basket. So here you go, play along with us: Summer is Ending and...

So is The Patience of the Grounded: The anti-helicopter forces are building and gathering strength. "'It felt like Apocalypse Now,' East Hampton resident Kathi Goldman said at a recent public hearing." There's a movement afoot—headed by an investment banker no less—to conduct a formal study of the noise generated by plane and helicopter traffic into and out of East Hampton airport—which would be the first step towards banning or reducing flights. I-bankers, we'll see you on the LIE.

So is Your Marriage: They always trot out this little statistical anomaly at this time of year. "'People don't want to initiate something when they're in the Hamptons or in Europe,' said Robert Dobrish, a New York divorce lawyer." After Labor Day though? Sayonara sucker, don't let the door hit you on the way out.

So are The Freewheeling Sharehouse Party Days: Southampton has passed "a new law which requires that rental properties—a whole house or a single apartment—must be leased and used by a single family, and that no rental can exceed the number of persons permitted in the state's fire prevention and building code." So much for the kegger, kids.

Summer is dead. Long live summer.
· Hamptons Helicopter Gridlock Stirs Up Air Rage on the Ground [Bloomberg]
· End of the Summer, Time for a Divorce? [ABC News]
· Southampton cracks down on summer rental uses [Newsday]

See more in About Town: The Word

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

SHAME: Henry Kravis' Neighbors Rally to Help Him

Anyone who's ever suggested that Hamptonites are rich, self-centered snobs who are interested only in their own welfare, hasn't seen what investor Henry Kravis's neighbors are doing for him today.

Concerned that Kravis might be forced to sell one of his numerous abodes, the "Southampton Alliance for Monied Estates (SHAME)" is mobilizing a protest to "Demand More Tax Breaks for Private Equity Kings." The press release announcing this effort continues:

Southampton "residents" will take to the streets Wednesday to demand more tax relief for buyout billionaires, including longtime Southamptonite billionaire Henry R. Kravis, inventor of the leveraged buyout and pioneer of the trillion-dollar private equity buyout industry.

Heartwarming, isn't it? Kravis might not be as moved as we are because the gathering is actually a protest organized by SEIU, a large service workers union that has been fighting the private equity giants and their practices, which often entail layoffs when taking over companies.

We're hoping the union isn't expecting sympathy at the corner of Main and Jobs in Southampton. That's private equity country through and through. And the only thing they'll get from passersby is looks of derision through the tinted windows of Mercedes SUVs, driven by ladies on their way to the Southampton Bathing Corp. for their evening Southsides, paid for by their private equity husbands and served by people who may in fact be members of SEIU. You gotta love this town.
· Union takes LBO protest to Hamptons [Reuters]
· Hamptons Residents Concerned Buyout Billionaire Neighbors Pay Too Much Tax [BehindtheBuyouts]

See more in About Town: The Word

WeatherDesk: Happy Ending

The collective sigh of relief about this weekend's weather is understandable. Over Labor Day weekend last year, and the year before, we had rain. As you can see, weather perfection is assured for this weekend. And, actually, for all of next week. Consider extending your share. Or just squat—legally we can almost guarantee that you can't be evicted until the end of September.
· 10-Day Forecast for Southampton [Weather.com]

See more in Intel: WeatherDesk

Monday, August 27, 2007

From Our Inbox: Jesus, Tracy Feith, Collichio, Chicken

Fashion Icon or Religious Icon?: An astute reader has graciously pointed out that the earlier post of Jesus on the Beach, may not be Jesus and that it may in fact be fashion designer and surfer Tracy Feith. We'll buy it.

Spotted: "Thought you may want to know that everyone's new favorite chef in the world who can do no wrong. TOM COLLICHIO was having dinner on the top level of Sunset Beach in Shelter Island Saturday night with a party of 6 people. We sat right behind him at 930pm and he was eating dessert. Wearing jeans, button blue striped shirt and unshaved (scruffed out). He seems like such a cocky ass on the show I didn't care to say hello, however my girlfriend was star struck by ol baldy..."

Not Spotted: "Everyone said Jimmy Buffet was going to be at The Talkhouse on Wednesday night. He didn't show up. There were a lot pf people wearing Hawaiian shirts though."

Hunger Pangs: "Noticed late Fri night and Late last night again there is no more BONBON sign on Star Room? Is it gone? Did it fail?" [Ed. note: A couple of calls to BonBon went unreturned. We're guessing they discovered that fried chicken and a nightclub might not be as synergistic as they had hoped.]

See more in Intel: BeachWire

LinkHampton

· Brangelina heads to the Hamptons for fundraiser—world stops to watch [People]
· 1 Rocco alone=failure; two Roccos together=assured success or abject failure [NYP]
· Newsday's breaking news: Lauren family colonizing East Hampton [Newsday]
· Life lessons: even after 12 years a rich, snobby bitch is still a rich, snobby bitch [NYT]
· Nicole Kidman and Jennifer Jason Leigh snuggle up in bed in their Hamptons share [NYM]
· Local broker wonders if mega-broker Michael Shvo's ego will fit in new Water Mill home [NYM]
· Yuppie with baseball bat meets trucker with tire iron. Guess who won? [theRudeHamptons]

See more in Intel: Link Hampton

Friday, August 24, 2007

Weekend Agenda: The "It's Almost Over" Edition

Even typing those words hurts. But we need to suck it up and face facts. We've got two weekends to work with here, so as a public service to our readers were going to give you a few tips to maximize your last few hours in the sun.

The view from the Montauket

The Fish Farm: Dog breeding meets geese meets seafood. This spot is not for the squeamish or those looking for fine dining and tablecloths. But if you don't mind wading through a muddy or teo, then the Fish Farm (properly, The Multi Aquacultural Systems) is the spot for some super fresh fish. Order at the little take out window, grab a picnic table down by the water, watch the sunset as you tuck into some steamers. And FYI it's BYOB. (429 Cranberry Hole Rd, Amagansett, 631-267-3341)

After the jump, a couple more slices of heaven...

See more in Intel: At Your Service

Rosé Report: Wolffer is Out, But We Found 1 Case...

It's official: Wolffer Estates is out of their absurdly popular rosé. Apparently, people have been stockpiling it over the past couple weeks (full disclosure: a few of the people involved with this site are guilty of this practice). As a public service we scoured the local liquor stores to see if there was a stray bottle to be found.

DePetris Liquor Store (Bridgehampton): "No, it's gone." Best Substitute: Chateau de Pourcieux, $13

Harbor Liquors (Sag Harbor): "Hang on, let me check...Nope." Best Substitute: Chateau de Pourcieux, $12.99

Amagansett Wines & Spirits: "No, I'm sorry, we're out." Best Substitute: Channing Daughters Rosé, $18.99 (Wine enthusiast note: "It's tough to find a similar one because of the high chardonnay content in the Wolffer.")

East Hampton Wine & Spirits: Hang on, let me double check... Yes sir, we have one case left. Would you like me to hold it for you?" Answer: "Yes please."

Herbert & Rist (Southampton): "No, sold out, won't be in again till the new vintage." Best Substitute: Chateau Menuti $19.99

Wainscott Wine & Spirits: "No, it's sold out for the season." Best Substitute: Channing Daughters Rosé, $18.99

Just try and beat us to East Hampton Wines & Spirits.

See more in Materialist: Retail

Ready. Set. Weekend.

Dress: For Bobby Van's happy hour
Bottle: The best spray-it-yourself tan
Pack: A spunkier picnic
Pick: Sunflowers from the farmstand
Party: For a cause at Summer Soiree
See: What ScarJo shot on the East End
Apply: Liberal doses of antiperspirant
Explore: Shelter Island beyond Sunset Beach
Equip: For emergency lobster-eating
Prepare: To brave the LIRR
Rise: And shine, Hamptons Classic at 08:00

See more in Ready. Set. Weekend.

In Heaven, Everyone Gets a Resident Beach Sticker

This is what happens when you give Christians a pail, a shovel and a weekend off. There's probably some deep metaphor that we could derive from sculpting the Last Supper out of sand (ashes to ashes, dust to dust...something like that), but it's Friday, so we're not going to bother.

Even more Jesus on the beach after the jump...

See more in About Town: The Word